Things I'm Dying to Tell You

1. I've been buying raw fresh milk from a local farm. It's THE BOMB. Also Mariah isn't allergic to it. She's allergic to store bought milk, but not raw milk. Explain that one.

2. We still have 5 chickens making their home in our backyard. One almost got eaten by a hawk....but didn't.

3. They're finally laying eggs! Three or four a day.

4. I made my own mozzarella cheese today and it's good!

5. I'm officially a freak! (deduced from the first four items I've been dying to tell you).

Ummmmmmm, also my kids are doing great. The house is great. I'm still homesick, but it comes and goes.

Pictures are coming as soon as I can find my camera battery charger. I've been looking [read: gazing aimlessly] for it everywhere. I have so many wonderful chicken pictures to share with you! Aren't you excited?!?!?!*

*Please refer to #5.

The Truth about Barbacoa

Have I told you the story about Barbacoa yet? I don't think I have, and since I just consumed my weight in barbacoa tacos following a very bad night and equally bad day I'll tell you it.

When Helmut and I were first married we used to drive down to Mexico at least once a month and spend the weekend with his parents. They would go out of their way to make Helmut's favorite Mexican dishes which soon became my favorite dishes, because while all food down there is much simpler in ingredients, it's somehow tastes much richer in flavors.....at least for me and my delinquent taste buds (a story for another time). Depending on who you're dining with the food may look strange.....scary even (because you know they do sell brain tacos and fried blood down there), but Helmut's parents are very picky in what they will eat and have never served me anything "weird" by American standards.

Our visits had gone on monthly for quite a while when they started to tire of making the same things over and over, so one afternoon before we were supposed to leave they brought in a precooked/pre-shredded meat, some fresh tortillas, limes, cilantro, and onions. I could tell they were a little nervous about feeding me this meat, but from what I could tell it just looked like some beef....and my gosh was it ever delicious! I ate and ate and ate until I was stuffed, towards the end I asked what it was exactly, they all avoided my eyes and Helmut told me it was goat meat. I told them it was the tastiest goat meat I'd ever had and I LOVED it.

Every visit for the next two years I specially requested that meal again to which they all politely declined, and not wanting to make my new In-Laws uncomfortable i quit asking for it.

Fast Forward through my pregnancy and Hayden's first year, and now I am halfway through my pregnancy with Mariah.... or I guess i could just say "3ish years later."-----

Helmut and I found a Mexican flee market on the outskirts of Austin and decided to spend the day looking around. At lunch time we made our way over to the taco stands and were trying to decide which kind of tacos to get. Unlike Mexican taco stands these places had the menu's in Spanish AND English. I'm just going to cut to the chase here, obviously you've figured out that there's a listing for the very literal translation of Barbacoa on there. It's Beef Head. BEEF HEAD. Like the whole head of a cow. I was really grossed out. I looked at Helmut and said "Beef HEAD?? LIKE THE HEAD OF A COW???" and he was all, "yeah, didn't i tell you that?(Guilty face). NO, No he did not. Oh well, at least I only ate it once.

Once his family realized that I knew what it was and still wanted it they began buying it for us again....once in a while....as a treat.....pretty much just for me.

I looked up recipes for making it at home and all of the authentic ones include purchasing the entire head and removing the eyes, ears, and tongue yourself, then wrapping it in tin foil and steaming it for a million hours. I don't think that's going to happen anything soon, and reading that turned my insides to jello for a while, but I'm hooked. Lets say it's a twice a year treat....or since we found that authentic taco place in Round Rock it's more like a once every 6 weeks treat.

Catch Up

The following few posts are of names my kids call stuff. None of these were prompted.

....Oh yeah, we're doing good. I finally got my computer to work again, let's hope it holds out for a little bit longer....or at least until we find some gold doubloons in our new backyard and can afford another Mac.

House for Sale: DIY Do or Die

The past three days we've been internetless or I'd have filled you in on the catastrophe that was our house. As you know we've had the house for sale for a week now. The second day it was for sale Helmut knocked off a couple of tiles in the shower exposing some ominously moldy drywall. That was the cause of freak out #1. When I say freak out, I'm really exaggerating, because while the mold was alarming, it was still easily fixed.

We both spent the entire day researching bathroom mold fixes DIY and came up with a plan. First remove all the tiles covering the moldy area. Second replace the wet drywall with backer board, and lastly, replace all the tiles and re grout. We began to execute our plan Thursday night after the kids went to bed. It took Helmut hours to clean off all the tiles so we could reuse them. Then he cut out the old drywall exposing......da da daaaaaaaaaaa (musical interlude), TERMITES. Crap.

I spent Friday lining up appointments with Termite inspectors to make sure that was the only affected area and to get it treated. By Monday we had a full termite inspection done which revealed only damage to the bathroom. Helmut was able to fix and patch the hole and now we are finally back in business. I just hope that seeing a gaping hole in the bathroom shower didn't turn away any buyers. Come on people you know you loved the house with the creepy bug infested bathroom. Nothing screams buy me like rotting drywall and the stench of mold.

House Woes and Other Stuff

As of Thursday our house is for sale. As of Friday our house no longer looks like a gem. Now it resembles a fixer upper, scarry, not-gonna-buy-that-house, house. Why? In short, Helmut leaned over in the shower and a bunch of tiles fell off the wall. I don't think he even bumped them. We've lived in this house for 4 years and somehow failed to realize the shower wall was a rotted, wet, moldy, old piece of drywall. duh. Everybody knows that.....except us. I did notice a slight crack in the tiles, but i thought that was normal? I don't know what I thought, but after using the shower for 4 years and not having it implode, i figured it was okay. I figured wrong, and now we are committed to completely redoing the shower, or at least whatever is affected by the rot, which appears to be the entire back wall. Guess what else happened on Friday....our bid got accepted on the new house we're planning on buying...ha ha ha. Oh well. What can a person do.

Instead of moping around and saving our pennies to pay for the shower repair and the new house, and the old house, and whatever else, we decided to take the kids to their first theater movie. So we got up early this morning and went to the first showing of "how to train your Dragon." Hayden sat silently and still through the entire movie while Helmut and I juggled Mariah as she wiggled around, demanded to hold the popcorn bucket at all times, spilled half a bottle of water on her lap, and flailed randomly. There were a few moments I thought to myself "maybe we should remove this little menace from the theater," but neither of us wanted to miss the action, so we distracted her with more popcorn. All in all it was great.

To sum up this very dry blog: House>bad, Movie>good.

Battle of the Doll

Is it just me or are pictures of dolls totally creepy?

Soon after my abrupt career as baby shoemaker ended I started making (or trying to make) dresses for Mariah. For a little while it was fun, but I quickly realized that there is no way making clothes for her is cheaper than buying them. Plus the cheap clothes at the store are always cuter than the weird things i make her, AND they hold up better in the washing machine. So I stopped making her clothes and despaired that I would ever be able to make anything with my sewing machine than wouldn't actually lose me money.....until last week.

{Enter: the naked doll}

Mariah got a really cute doll for her birthday. It's called bath doll or something from Target. It came dressed in a little t-shirt and a diaper which Mariah promptly removed. In the months since Mariah's birthday we have fought an epic battle of clothed doll vs naked doll, with me repeatedly dressing the thing while she as quickly undresses it and leaves it lying around naked. A couple of days ago I was trying to redress the dolly without her noticing when I couldn't find the shirt or diaper. She must have stashed them somewhere when I wasn't paying attention. That night after she went to bed I had an idea. Why not make some doll clothes out of the scraps I had left from my failed attempts at .....everything else I've tried to make so far.

Three days later I'm finished. I think they're decent, if not a little cute. Certainly cuter than anything I've made for Mariah thus far. In case you can't tell what they're supposed to be, they're doll pajamas. I priced some doll clothes at target which go for 8.99$ on sale and 9.99$ regular price. These probably cost me .50 cents in materials, and 1 hour in time (only because I made my own pattern). So there, I finally found something that is cheaper made at home. Doll Clothes.

Is this the beginning of my career as a doll clothing designer? Who knows. But it's certainly the start of something. At the very least Mariah's dolls will have clothing, whether she chooses to allow them to be clothed or not.

Life with Chicks: The Raddist Cage on the Planet

After the chicken eating contest that the cats held a couple weeks ago, Helmut took it upon himself to build the remaining chickens a cage to keep them safe. This also means they no longer take up a stinky space in our garage. I'm pleased....as are the chickens.

Spider Advice---->Help!

I just googled "are spiders attracted to certain people." You want to know why? The day we spent at the ranch with friends marks the 4th occasion on which I have found a spider resting on Mariah's shoulder.

When I was little my siblings got kicks out of watching shows like "America's Most Wanted," Kujo," "The Gremlins," and pretty much anything scary, so when "Arachnophobia" came out they were all over it. I must have watched it 3 or 4 times before I realized I didn't like watching scary movies. To this day I will close my eyes if I think something scary is going to happen....not that I'm scared ---->pashaw----> I just don't want to have repeats of those scenes playing over and over in my head when I'm trying to fall asleep...which is inevitably what happens. Anyway, that was also the point in my young life where I realized that I am absolutely terrified of spiders. For a long time after that movie I would double and triple check the toilet to make sure there weren't any in there, and I would always let the shower run for a few minutes to make sure no spiders would come out of the shower head.

I'll never forget the time I was walking with Helmut and Hayden on trail at one of the local parks when i began to notice all these freakishly large spiders living in the trees over head. There were hundreds of them....and FREAKISHLY LARGE.....like oreo cookie sized. I contemplated blacking out, but the thought of laying under them was worse than the thought of sprinting to the car and hopefully out running their creepy spider intentions.

There was also that time when I was living out at Camp Eagle. I was heading back home one evening 6 miles into the 8 mile driveway when I spotted a tarantula crossing the road. So naturally I slowed down and let it go by.

Let this be a lesson to you parents. Don't let your kids watch scary stuff on TV or they may develop certain irrational fears.

Back to Mariah: Four times now I have found spiders on her shoulder. FOUR. Can anyone explain this?! I have NEVER found a spider on Hayden's person. DOES SHE NEED MORE BATHS? IS IT A BLOOD TYPE THING? Somebody clue me in so i don't have to keep flicking spiders off of her. All the stress from the spider flicking is also probably the REAL explanation as to why my diet is NOT WORKING......but that's another blog post.

Confession: Interpretations

Confession: Sometimes when Mariah talks it sounds like she's speaking in Russian. In those moments I really wish I had taken the time to learned to speak Russian so we might have a chance at understanding each other.

Life with Chicks: Still Alive

We've had the chickens for a few weeks now, and miraculously they're all still alive. I say "miraculously" because last week Hayden tried to play softball with them and almost broke one of their legs. I actually thought he broke it because the bird didn't move for a few days, but now I can't tell which one got hit, so I think they're all fine.

New House Rule: No playing catch with the birds.

That said, the chickens are easy to care for, and hardier than I thought. Hayden has been quite rough with them despite repeated time-outs, spankings and conversations about why we shouldn't be rough with the chicks i.e. "they will die!" I realized before I got them that it would be a challenge to keep them alive around Hayden. He doesn't have mean intent, but he really likes to play rough. What I didn't count on though was how badly they would smell. I now know why birds are called Fowl. The stench emanating from our garage at this time can be described using words such as: Special, Unbelievable, Disgusting, and FOWL. I never realized they could smell this badly. I gotta say I'm really looking forward to getting them out of the garage in into the farthest corner of the back yard so I don't have to vomit in my mouth every time i feed them. Even I who claim little to no sense of smell can smell more of these birds than I ever cared too.

I wish it had been possible to buy full grown egg layers. That would have made my life much easier. But I guess this way Hayden is "bonding" with them.

Conversations with a Three Year Old: Garbage

Me: "Hayden, please pick up those raisins that you dropped on the floor and put them in the trash."

Hayden: "Okay!"

Me: "Where are the raisins?"

Hayden: "I put them in the trash can in my mouth."

Easter Egg Hunt

Today we made an offer on a house we really wanted.....and within hours we got rejected and they picked somebody else. I thought i wasn't going to care if that happened, but it turns out i took so many pictures of this ugly old house trying to decide if we could fix it, that i somehow got emotionally attached. So instead of talking about how bummed I am, I'm going to show you some pictures of the Easter egg hunt we went to at our church on Saturday.

Conversations with a Three Year Old: Meals

The Owl in the back is Hayden, the one in front is me, and no Karaoke during nap time is NOT MY THING.

Not only were we trying to accomplish nap time today while getting a new roof put on our house, but we were also interrupted by various things at 15 minute intervals for the first hour....i.e..bathroom, doorbell, doorbell, pounding...etc. ect. This conversation took place after we settled down again for the fourth attempt at a nap:


Hayden: "Mommy, can i have some breakfast?"

Me: "No, we just ate lunch."

Hayden: "I don't want lunch, I want breakfast."

Me: "You can have a snack after you take your nap."

Hayden: "OKAY!!!!!!!"

Me: After that I believe I admitted an audible growl, but i can't be sure.

He then spent the next 30 minutes poking my face, kicking the wall, and singing until Mariah finally woke up and miraculously he fell asleep.

Photo courtesy of Lolcats

House for Sale.....Again.

We've finally bit the bullet and are trying to put our house up for sale again. It's been more than a year since our first attempt, and I have to admit I'm dreading it and have been for the entire year. In some ways it'll be nice to get this step of our lives over with so I can stop feeling like it's hanging around my neck with imminent strangleage (sound it out, and yes, i made that word up - take that spell check) about to take place.

Last year Mariah was a cranky baby, we had a realtor we weren't sure about, and a mortgage broker we were REALLY not sure about, and even a home inspector that we thought was pulling our leg a little. So, you can imagine when you put all those together along with the idea of purchasing a new home things might get a little hairy. Well they did. They got VERY VERY hairy, so we called it quits, took our house back off the market and then spent the next 12 months contemplating moving to Pennsylvania in order to be closer to family. There are several reasons why that didn't work out, but I'll save that for another post.

This year is different. We LOVE our Realtor, we TRUST our mortgage lender, and we've already dragged our feet so long that nobody could possibly be in this for quick money....i mean we're talking a year, that's a long time to wait for a commission.....sorry David. Next week we'll be putting our house on the market. We've already found a Money Pit that we can't pass up and are going to try and put on offer on. I'm not sure what it is about fixer uppers that attract me, but for some reason my heart falls hard for the orange painted trim, the early 90's decor, and the crusty paint covered rugs.

Confession: Poultry

Confession: Every time the chickens fall asleep in the pen outside I think they're dead.....every time.

Diet Log: The Day After Day 5

In case you're wondering what happened after I left you last night, I'm going to tell you. I finished typing my last few sentences about guilt and despair and was poised to lay in bed counting my extra rolls until sleep descended upon me when Helmut came in and literally pulled my leg until I got out of bed and went to work out with him in our garage.

Two and a half years ago we set up our garage as a home gym. We were ready to get fit, at home, in the luxury of our own garage...never mind that the temperature in there is 100+ degrees in the summer. Week 1 went stupendously, I was down a few pounds and feeling GREAT, week 2 I found out I was pregnant with Mariah. Week two day 2 was probably the last time we used that home gym. I spent the next 9 months laying on the couch in between outings with Hayden and after that, labor, back injury, and lots of sissy whining.....which brings us to last week.....

I was having lunch with a good friend from church when we got on the subject of blood type characteristics. After that discussion I went home and researched the Blood Type Diet. What I found was many many unhappy participants who said it was a joke, and had been dis-proven as a myth, blah blah blah, so when I found the actual official website I was ready to laugh my way through the blood type descriptions and scoff at anyone gullible enough to actually trust that kind of blather. DUN DUN DUN. Then I proceeded to read an incredibly accurate description of myself, so specific at times it was scary. It was in fact so accurate that upon reading it I was certain that my mother and myself must share a blood type....that is, type O. The next day I texted my parents who confirmed my suspicions.

One of the more important and constructive things I took out of it was that when I feel like I'm getting grouchy, to go exercise......which finally brings me to yesterday. We went to the garage, cleaned out the chicken's box, rigged up some special lighting for them, then I got on the elliptical trainer and did 1 full minute of intense cardio before realizing it was 11pm and I was exhausted, so I came back inside and went to bed. Anticlimactic i know, but at least i didn't cheat on my diet!

Diet Log: Day 5 Doldrums

Yes, you read that title correctly. I'm back on the diet "horse." After taking a 6 month break....let's call it a break, I've finally gotten really REALLY sick of my waistline again. I tried starting up the diet about 6 weeks ago, and was doing so well I was just getting ready to blog about my triumphant 5 lb weight loss when we got invited over to a friends house for dinner. That doesn't sound terribly threatening....and indeed it wasn't until the hostess asked me to bring some Brie. Brrriiiieeeeee. Say that out loud in a breathy, sultry sort of voice. It's not as if I've never had brie before. In fact I'd had it several times and quite liked it each time. I guess I had never built up the temerity to buy it myself, and here someone was asking me to buy it and giving me an excuse to go looking for it. So i went to the grocery store and hunted until i found it, bought it, took it to the party, and enjoyed it on my crusty french bread along with some pretty spectacular Beef Bourguignon.

I happened to buy a whole extra cheese, so after the party the hostess handed me the extra cheese and I took it home and stuck it in the fridge. That was the beginning of a very indulgent 6 week love affair with brie. I'm not going to say how many wedges or different types of brie i tried in that time, because frankly it's embarrassing. Let's just say I'm trying to keep my grubby mitts away from the specialty cheese section until the last 10 lbs of weight are lost. Oh yeah, i gained back that whole 5 lbs in two weeks and added 2 more lbs before I finally realized that Brie slathered on french bread for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, is not diet friendly.

Today is day 5 back on the diet and I've definitely hit the 5th day slump. Day's 1 and 2 I was patting myself on the back as the pounds were flying off, day 3 I figured the scale needed a break, day 4 I was not excited about the stop in weight loss, but not depressed. Then I hit day 5. Day 5 seems to be a real deal breaker for me EVERY SINGLE TIME. Three days of an unrelenting scale have put a frown on my face and a small chip on my shoulder. I hate it when the scale is mean, and let's face it, it's the scales fault. It has NOTHING to do with my chocolate obsession. I'm supposed to be exercising right now, to try and budge the scale, but I've decided to write this instead to make myself feel really really ridiculous in front of people just in case I am tempted to cheat tonight....which I always am on Day 5. So there you go. If you don't get anymore diet updates for a while it's because I've cheated and I'm really embarrassed.

How to Make a Latte in 4 Minutes Flat

While we were on vacation my younger brother introduced me to this puppy. The Bialetti Mukka Express. It's a stove top cappuccino maker that also happens to be able to produce a decent latte. As soon as we came home I looked it up and took off to my local Williams-Sonoma to buy one. I'm convinced it will save me money in the long run, and if not at least I'll be able to drink my latte without having to drive somewhere to get it.

Since we're on the subject of Lattes I would like to send some negativity in the general direction of Starbucks. Starbucks, if you're reading this, for heavens sakes please make the bottle tops of your bottled lattes smaller. What the heck are you trying to pull using a humongous bottle top??? The only thing it accomplishes is to make me look like a moron while drinking. I either have to open my mouth uncomfortably wide to keep it from spilling, or take little sips while the top rim dribbles coffee on my nose. I have seriously avoided buying said lattes for that reason. Also: your coffee is too bitter. Roasted to burntfection.

Friends with Kids

Christina and I with our arms full of babies...and more to come (on Christina's end that is:)

New Camera

My birthday was two weeks ago, and since I think I've learned as much as the little 3 mega pixel camera in my iphone can teach me, I asked Helmut to get me a real camera as my birthday gift. He did as promised and allowed me to have my pick. The first one I got was a Fuji 10 mega pixel point and click digital camera. The pictures were just okay, but not much of an improvement from my iphone, so last night amidst much kicking and screaming (Hayden AND Mariah), lots of shredded paper (Mariah), and an iphone game distraction (Hayden), we managed to pick out a Nikon DX 3000. We did not do research, and we had LOTS of distractions so we're both really hoping this camera lives up to the price tag. It was 550$ at Best Buy, so it was the cheapest of all the much more professional looking cameras. This morning I took the kids to the park to try it out and have to say I'm liking it. Of course I have no more experience than a person whose taken 1,200 pictures with an iphone, so i really feel like a poser.....or the paparazzi. It reminds me of Julia Roberts cell phone in My Best Friends Wedding. The following are my three favorite pictures before the battery died....which was about 15 minutes and 15 photos. Next time I should probably try charging it first.

I should also probably properly clean my child's face before our next photo shoot. *guffaw*