Friday, August 7, 2009

Helpful Guides

Toddler guide to eating grapes:
1. Separate grapes from stem.
2. Fling stem to the farthest corner of the kitchen.
3. Consume half of grapes and fling the other half to the opposite
corner of the kitchen.
4. Wipe sticky hands on shirt, face, table, mom's legs and chair.

9 month old guide to eating grapes:
1. Eat two bites of cereal.
2. Refuse emphatically all additional foods.
3. Scream until released from high chair.
4. Covertly crawl to grape leftovers on floor and consume being sure
to add any bugs that might be lying around ( if no bugs are available
rocks and/or dirt is also acceptable.)
5. Bite mother as hard as possible when she attempts to remove said

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